Future Imperfect.
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Forum for your general poetry that may or may not also fit into other forums as well. If you wouldn't want your 12-year old daughter to read it, don't post it here.
Autoprune 12 months.
Forum for your general poetry that may or may not also fit into other forums as well. If you wouldn't want your 12-year old daughter to read it, don't post it here.
Autoprune 12 months.
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- Forever Silent Friend
- Posts: 536
- Joined: Mon Sep 05, 2011 7:16 am
- Location: UK
Future Imperfect.
Future Imperfect
Beneath a gray and weeping sky.
I watched a horse drawn hearse go by
A sight we very rarely see
It seems to have more dignity
Than any slowly driven limousine.
Two horses black as ebony.
A well matched pair walk sedately
Almost as if the horses know.
The must put on a finer show.
Than any slowly driven limousine
The hearse itself is gleaming black
With etched glass windows in the back.
Through which it’s possible to see
The coffin more respectfully.
Than any slowly driven limousine.
The cortege as it passes by
Is guaranteed to catch the eye.
It is a sight that seemingly
Most people would prefer to see.
Than any slowly driven limousine.
Though fashions change there is a cost.
The sense of dignity is lost
Although I’m sure they do their best
Nothing attracts less interest.
Than any slowly driven limousine.
Saturday, 17 September 2011
http:// blog.myspace.com/poeticpiers
Beneath a gray and weeping sky.
I watched a horse drawn hearse go by
A sight we very rarely see
It seems to have more dignity
Than any slowly driven limousine.
Two horses black as ebony.
A well matched pair walk sedately
Almost as if the horses know.
The must put on a finer show.
Than any slowly driven limousine
The hearse itself is gleaming black
With etched glass windows in the back.
Through which it’s possible to see
The coffin more respectfully.
Than any slowly driven limousine.
The cortege as it passes by
Is guaranteed to catch the eye.
It is a sight that seemingly
Most people would prefer to see.
Than any slowly driven limousine.
Though fashions change there is a cost.
The sense of dignity is lost
Although I’m sure they do their best
Nothing attracts less interest.
Than any slowly driven limousine.
Saturday, 17 September 2011
http:// blog.myspace.com/poeticpiers
- heinzs
- The Fat Cat
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Re: Future Imperfect.
Yes, much more civilized than a limousine hearse. There are few areas nowadays, though, where such can be accomplished. Modern cities no longer accommodate horses other than the few that still have mounted police patrols like San Francisco and New York, and those are limited to the parks.
Cheers Ivor!
Cheers Ivor!
An' it harm none, do what ye will. Blessed Be.
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My Poet's Page Archive | Topics I've started
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- Forever Silent Friend
- Posts: 536
- Joined: Mon Sep 05, 2011 7:16 am
- Location: UK
Re: Future Imperfect.
Speed is of the essence in todays world. WE have no time to stand and stare.
Re: Future Imperfect.
...again! very well written on a kind of "distinction" I haven't thought of before and a great subject for a poem!
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- Forever Silent Friend
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- Joined: Mon Sep 05, 2011 7:16 am
- Location: UK
Re: Future Imperfect.
Anything can be the subject of a poem
I do not understand the concept of writers block.
I do not understand the concept of writers block.
Re: Future Imperfect.
Writer's block is not really a concept. It is often a period of gestation which can be quite frustrating but also quite transforming when the art reconfigures itself. It may be less intense for some and much more so for others. Processes take time. Congratulations if you never felt any such hiatus.
Re: Future Imperfect.
I loved the concept of this piece. The final line being repeated in each verse gave a very somber tone to the whole poem, which I'm sure was intended. A poem to meditate our own mortality with my friend. Well done.
I prefer to keep an open mind,....but not so much that my brains fall out.- Carl Sagan
Your brain is like an umbrella. It only works when it's open- Someone Smart
Poet of the Month
March 2011
Your brain is like an umbrella. It only works when it's open- Someone Smart
Poet of the Month
March 2011
- JukotoxKanashimi
- batteries not included
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Re: Future Imperfect.
i want to echo what bags123 said about the concept of this poem. It was very very brilliantly executed with the repetition. Now I'm left pondering cost efficient but has it cost us something else? Hmmm.
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