Another Life

A place for new members to post their poetry so we may get to know them and their poetry better. Caution: may contain mature content or language.
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A place for new members to post their poetry so we may get to know them and their poetry better. NO erotica.
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Jetz
Clearwater Poet
Posts: 37
Joined: Sat Jun 27, 2009 9:16 am
Location: Grand Rapids MI

Another Life

Post by Jetz » Thu Jul 02, 2009 12:51 pm

Another Life


For days now I've been dreaming
four separate days and nights .
Strange for me to dream like this
you'd think I'd have it right.
The dream never changes,
it's been the same each time.
Starting with the glow from the fire,
to the way your lips meet mine.

Opening vision is this wall.
A large wall that's made of stone.
Located dead in the center,
a raging fire, nearby I sit, alone
I'm dressed in a long white gown.
There's candles everywhere.
In my hands I hold a paper,
In my eyes, just a blank stare.

There's music somewhere playing,
'least I think that's what I hear.
There's a definite rhythm beating,
not just me, it's everywhere.
Then this knock sounds out loudly
startling me right to the core
This chill runs down my body
as you walk in thru the door.

Now this part seems quite silly
before me you stand in frills .
You speak to me in tongues of old
in your hand, a writing quill
'Neath your arm you carry a journal.
There's a sword strapped to your side.
Though I know not what you're saying,
unmistakable, the look in your eyes.

Then suddenly,this aroma,
a cross between fruit and spice.
To me it's vaguely familiar,
exciting, both fire and ice !
You hand to me this goblet,
you stare into my eyes.
As you encourage me to drink ,
your face wet with tears you cried .

You take my face into your hands,
your eyes see to my soul.
With our lips nearly touching,
you whisper soft and low.
Try as I may I can't hear you,
or somehow I don't understand.
You smile at me with those green eyes,
and point to the page in my hand.

As my eyes focus upon it,
the paper comes to life.
There within these same four walls
stood us in another life.
Your arms were wrapped around me.
Your lips were pressed to mine.
Our bodies were joined together,
but another place, in time

As I look up from the paper,
suddenly I feel a chill.
As I slowly look around me
I see a bird ,upon the sill.
As he flies off, a breeze is blowing,
the page is taken from my hand.
It flutters into the fire,
and there I am......alone again...




Jetz
Last edited by Jetz on Mon Jul 06, 2009 11:03 am, edited 1 time in total.

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heinzs
The Fat Cat
Posts: 8419
Joined: Tue Dec 18, 2001 12:01 am
Tag line: Do no harm
Location: Novato, CA
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Re: Another Life

Post by heinzs » Sat Jul 04, 2009 12:19 pm

I really like this. You write great stuff. I think it would be better, though, without the double spacing... easier on the eyes and less scrolling.

:hello: :cool:
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Jetz
Clearwater Poet
Posts: 37
Joined: Sat Jun 27, 2009 9:16 am
Location: Grand Rapids MI

Re: Another Life

Post by Jetz » Mon Jul 06, 2009 11:07 am

Hi Heinz,
Thanks for the nice comment and advice. I made the change you suggested. Thanks, you were right. It makes a big difference. Is there a way to change the font style ?

Jetz

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heinzs
The Fat Cat
Posts: 8419
Joined: Tue Dec 18, 2001 12:01 am
Tag line: Do no harm
Location: Novato, CA
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Re: Another Life

Post by heinzs » Mon Jul 06, 2009 8:31 pm

The only options we have are bold, italics or underlined, "normal", tiny, small, large or huge, a variety of colors and centered or left oriented. No choice of fonts... sorry. If you paste in from a word processor you may get some "interesting" results... i haven't tried it.

:cool:
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An' it harm none, do what ye will. Blessed Be.
Image
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Onion Head

Re: Another Life

Post by Onion Head » Tue Jul 07, 2009 12:24 am

Hi Jetz -

I've really enjoyed this writing. Writing about dreams allows the poet's creativity to flow and that's exactly what you've done. You have created a world within a world. I like the concept of reality sinking into the dream.
I shall study this further and get back to you with suggestions.

OH

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Jetz
Clearwater Poet
Posts: 37
Joined: Sat Jun 27, 2009 9:16 am
Location: Grand Rapids MI

Re: Another Life

Post by Jetz » Tue Jul 07, 2009 5:23 pm

Thanks for the info on the font Heinz...I miss my font. :crying: I never realized just how much of a brat I am .

:shrug:
:grin:


O.H. Welcome,
Thank you for taking the time to read and respond to this piece. It is one of my own favorites, and really was born from a dream that I had.


Jetz

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gordy
Windfall Prophet
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Joined: Thu Apr 18, 2002 12:01 am
Location: HAMILTON OHIO

Re: Another Life

Post by gordy » Tue Jul 07, 2009 7:17 pm

:thumbsup:
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My Jesus hung out with thieves and sluts and liars, which Jesus do you worship?

---Todd Agnew


Perfection is my enemy
Procrastination is his cohort
Persistence is my sword

---Gordy

angeltears
Clearwater Poet
Posts: 45
Joined: Sat Oct 20, 2007 9:05 am

Re: Another Life

Post by angeltears » Sat Jul 18, 2009 9:45 am

One more of these pleasures to enjoy reading Jetz. Dreams can tell so much and they are never just empty dreams, always they have some meaning and come from deep in our soul. Thanks for sharing! *angel

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Mpumelelo Rantsolase
Clearwater Poet
Posts: 39
Joined: Wed Dec 19, 2001 12:01 am
Location: South Africa

Re: Another Life

Post by Mpumelelo Rantsolase » Mon Jul 20, 2009 9:08 am

Ahem if I may just say :thumbsup:

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Jetz
Clearwater Poet
Posts: 37
Joined: Sat Jun 27, 2009 9:16 am
Location: Grand Rapids MI

Re: Another Life

Post by Jetz » Mon Jul 20, 2009 11:19 am

Wow, I am pleasantly surprised at the reviews to this piece. It holds a special place in my heart, and I am very pleased that you all found it worthy of your reads and comments too. Thank you, dearly.

Sue :grin:

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