moonflowers highlights January - June 2007

Moderator's monthly picks from the "Funny Business" forum

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moonflowers highlights January - June 2007

Post by moonflower » Wed Jan 31, 2007 9:08 pm

well the new year has begun! in the funny farm there were 17 postings in January!..thats so wonderful! :lol: a big thanks to all of you who stopped in :lol: ..its such a joy to me to come in here and get to read all the talented pieces..these are the two that are to be highlighted for the month of January :grin: :grin: ..


Google Truth....written by SamIAm

I met you on the bus
I liked you right away-
Your feminine smile
Your challenging wit,
Missed my stop for yours that day

I had to learn more about you
So I did what I always do-
I got you to tell me what your name was,
Then went home and “Googled” you
Such a great tool, this Google
And I can tell you’ve been around
I typed in your name
Then I hit “search”
And this is what I found:

You died in 1860
At the age of twenty-two
You appeared again in 1910
Then died from Spanish Flu
According to “My Space” you’re twelve years old,
And you live somewhere in Spain,
So you lied since you told me you’re thirty-one
And lived your whole life in Maine

You run a porno web site,
Kind of weird, but also cool-
But I’m kind of bothered by this hobby of yours
Since you’re also a nun and teach pre-school
You own a church in Salt Lake City
Run a bar in Paris France-
You’re the leader of the Ku Klux Klan,
But teach black kids how to dance

You’ve climbed Mount Everest,
Lost your legs in Nam,
Was shot dead in World War Two-
You’re a lawyer, a doctor
A Mexican maid
You have a job feeding seals at the Compton Zoo
You have your own band
But you’re deaf and blind,
You’re currently alive
But you’re dead-
You’re five, you’re fifty,
You’re one hundred years-old
You died in Iraq when they cut of your head

Now I know the facts about you,
So I’ll keep our relationship frugal-
I’m so glad for the accurate information,
Thank you! Thank you, Google!


We Found Peace
but no Valley. . . written by Nancy

Dressed in winter gear
double jackets
triple socks
spare gloves
stuffed into hip pockets. . .

mittens colored red
dog brought his
own coat…
walking down
you said,
a valley here?
down. . .

Just wore this coat. . .
wind is fierce in the forest
forgot the axe
we - are - lost…
aren't we?

Snow Is crusted…
feet chewing
into thin slices
of white
of a rainbow. . .
Rain is far
from here.

In these eyes, I can make sun melt snow...
as a dream…
sleep -
in the valley?
No valley

Yesterday you had the map. . .
plans drawn.
I thought you
double checked
before we left
You - are - so

Black ink -
last years.
The real one fell
behind the bedpost. . .
last night.
I thought you knew?

Grab the paper sack
eat baloney sandwiches
build a tent. . .
I learned that in brownies. . .

Don’t laugh - I have to pray on my knees...
Grandmother taught me
never practiced much.

Forgive him for misplacing the road map…
can you send a little sun?
Maybe change the seasons. . .
or even, fly over us and lead us home?


well thanks again to all who came into the funny forum during January :grin: the door is always open so drop in anytime!..hope to see all of you even more during February :mrgreen:
inside each soul there is music...let the music play..

visit my poets page


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Post by moonflower » Tue Jun 19, 2007 6:47 pm

hi to everyone :lol: i apologise for getting these highlights posted so late..(my 'other life' has kept me hoppin' around like a jack rabbit these past few weeks!) :lol:... in the funny farm there were 18 postings for February..thats so, so great!! :lol: a BIG thank you to all of you who came in and browsed or posted during the month..well, here are the ones in the spotlight for February.. :lol: :lol:


Too Drunk....written by SomeoneLost

Too drunk too see straight
Too drunk to know right
Too drunk too type straight
Thank God for Word, right?


3 A.M.....written by Heinzs

Cocks crow
it's still hours before dawn
something has disturbed them
and me
The silence is oppressive
like a column of enveloping cloud
stifling sound
hazing thoughts
The Earth shudders
and rumbles like thunder
sudden adrenaline rush
tightens throat
closes an iron fist
around beating heart
Gasp for breath
and leap from bed
The mind rushes
…or some man-made cataclysm?
Distant sirens do not dispel
orange alert fear.
lights work
dial tone ok
turn on the news
"… epicenter near Folsom…"
relief floods in…
just another morning in California.


Odd Ball....written by bags123

I'll take charge
in situations
which leave most
gaping aghast

At the nuanced
in aspersions
I have cast

After several pints
of bitters
foams, and froths
between my lips

I can out cuss
any sailor
who's just disembarked
his ship

If I'm out
in public places
where decorum
is advised

I'll be
there commiserating,
while my words
are all chastized.


well that wraps it up for the month.. :grin: again i want to thank everybody who stopped in during February..and i hope i see all of you even more now that March is here! :mrgreen:
inside each soul there is music...let the music play..

visit my poets page


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Post by moonflower » Tue Jun 19, 2007 6:48 pm

hi sorry to be late (AGAIN!!) :darn: in getting these posted :mrgreen:.. in the funny forum there were 23 postings for March!!..thats so incredibly awesome!!..a big thanks to all of you! :lol: its so great to get to read everybody's talented work in here!..each piece is so good!!..well here are the March highlights.. :grin:


TIME MANAGEMENT....written by nekot

....tick tock tick tock....
Who invented this damnable clock?!?

....tick tock tick tock....
Hatchet in hand, BASH - SMASH - CHOP!!!


Ahhhhh; that's better

Time Management


A Love Poem....written by IfOnly...IfOnly..

Roses are red,

Violets are blue.

I cannot rhyme,

I think you're pretty.


To State the Absurd....written by Milk White Chocolate

I thought I really was clever.
But I looked like a nerd,
When at customs they heard,
Me state the absurd,
“-You can’t X-ray through leather!”


Don’t Go To The Mall....written by LostNight

In the local town mall
It was a quarter to twelve
Looking, with no money at all

The parents there
And kids that don’t care
Temper-tantrum pulling her hair

Old mall walkers
A group of young talkers
Excuse me! I’m on my cell

The food court has speed eaters
A new flick in the theater
About sloppy dressed skater's dares

The parking lots full of cars
It seems we can’t find ours
Sending scouts, with their eyes wide open

Found where we parked
Need to escape before dark
Vowing to never come back to the mall

With tweens at home
A few bus tokens
I swear, the next time
They’ll go it alone…


well that does it for the month of March :grin: ..hey thanks again to everyone who came in and visited during the come on back even more in April!! :mrgreen: :lol:
inside each soul there is music...let the music play..

visit my poets page


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Post by moonflower » Tue Jun 19, 2007 6:49 pm

hi everyone :lol: well.. :mrgreen: i am late posting again :darn:.. in the funny forum there were 9 postings for the month..all of them are wonderful! :grin: so my thanks to all of you who came in to are the ones in the spotlight for April.. :grin: :grin:


The shopping list....written by Milk White Chocolate

Toilet paper
Loose tea
12 bananas
Smelly brie
1 carton of milk
Pack of peas
Sesame seeds
Most Important
Must not forget
The six-pack
For my beloved pet


Poetry By Twits....written by bags123

Poetry's for whores,and faggots
Beatnik, longhaired, fools,
who've impaled us with their wisdom
learned at hypocritic schools,

and although their art has merit
by their arbitrary rules,
it has now become apparent,
that their poetry's for fools

Poetry's for drunkards
who escape the mortal coil
However temporarily,
like Arthur Conan Doyle

who drank to self preserve his words
so they would never spoil
That's why poetry's for drunkards
who escape the mortal coil

Poetry's for charlatans
The kind you'd love to kick
where they skulk in lonely meetings
in their charlatanic cliques.

Smoking pipes of peppered paradoxes,
playing verbal tricks
Those of pompous declinations,
quoting poems written by twits.


Canned Spam (Title Changed) ....written by LostNight

One day feeling hungry
Like I never felt before
Decided to go down to the
Neighborhood grocery store

Fumbling through the isles
Looking for a tasty treat
Found a strange square can
Amongst other luncheon meats

So many ways to prepare it
You can cook it in a pan
Or slap it between some bread
With eggs and other types of ham

I prefer it with taters
Or any way you can
One thing you never want to do
Is to read the ingredients of your very
Own can of Spam...


well i hope to see all of you again, now that May has begun..ahh..feels like summer is really here :lol: ..i love May!..hey, thanks again for stopping by! :lol: :lol:
inside each soul there is music...let the music play..

visit my poets page


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Post by moonflower » Tue Jun 19, 2007 6:51 pm

i apologise for these postings being so late..last week was my two daughters' highschool graduations and this week was our final dance recital week!..(ive been running around like a chicken with its head cut off this whole month!! :mrgreen:) ..things are settleing down now tho thank goodness! :grin:
..well here in the funny farm there were 20 postings for May!..thats so absolutely super!! :lol: thanks so much to all of you who made that a reality!..its a real joy to see so many posting in here!..well here are the ones in the spotlight for May.. :grin: :grin:


Leave Me Smiling ....written by nekot

Some sing high
Some sing low
Some sing in between

Some move fast
Some move slow
Some move in the mean

Whatever your pitch
Whatever your tone
Whatever your rhythm or beat

Allow your voice
Express your own,
Then pass some over to me.

A smile and a wink you're sure to see.

may 7, 2007

(And you thought this was gonna be about sex. )


Never Just Agree....written by bags123

I use very salty language,
but it's never been my fault
I learned it from my mother,
in examples that she taught

Her use of crude superlatives
would make my father blush
He'd often take her from the room
and ask her please to hush

Especially if she had a few
Those adjectives would follow,
and I would always drink them in
to taste, and finally swallow

She really was a good old girl
who loved me as her son
It seemed her first priority
was making work get done.

She'd give the shirt right off her back
to those she deemed her friends,
but God help those she didn' like,
and wouldn't till the end

Her voice was rather mellow
in comparison to mine
It lilted when she'd sing a song
from some forgotten time

I remember once when I was small
the words she spoke to me;
"Never give up. Do not accept,
and never just agree".


FRECKLES....written by Juzjon

Hi, my name is Freckles
and it's your lucky day
I decided to move in with you
and here I'm gonna stay

I'm as ugly as a mud fence
my nose is charcoal black
every color in the spectrum
I wear upon my back

I know that you will love this too
my tummy's full of kitties
and if you don't believe me
just feel these swollen titties

If you'll let me in your house
I promise to abide
I won't go scratching sofas
I'll go stinky here outside

Well thank you, yes I'm hungry
and this milk is great
but it's too cold to sleep outside
and now it's getting late

Awww, a little box for me
filled with towels and such
I think I'll just nap a while
and thank you very much

Ahah, now they are sleeping
this place I must explore
and what's this on the counter?
oops, now it's on the floor

These curtains are just heaven
they make my claws feel strong
so what? I put a tear in them
is that so very wrong?

The fireplace looks interesting
I wonder what it's like?
there's just one way to find out
go in and take a hike

This really doesn't smell so good,
just look, I'm such a mess
I'll lie here on the carpet floor
and just clean up I guess

Yummy there's a bird in here
must introduce myself
hi my name is Freckles
I saw you from the shelf

I hope that you won't mind
me swinging on your cage
I promise not to eat you
just stop this noisy rage

Meow, now you've gone and done it
the lights are coming on
nice folks are coming down the stairs
back to my box...... yawn!
"Honey, come and see this
and please don't have a spell
but this @!#%** " Freckles"
is the cat from Hell !!! "


well a big, big thank you to everyone who visited here in May :lol: come on back and visit even more in June! :mrgreen: :grin:
inside each soul there is music...let the music play..

visit my poets page


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Post by moonflower » Tue Jun 19, 2007 6:51 pm

wow, July snuck up on me! :mrgreen: the funny forum there were 16 postings for the month of June :grin: thats great! :grin: thanks to everyone who took the time to pop in and are the ones to be highlighted.. :grin:


Time.....written by hindsight

If time was meant to be wasted,
As wines were made to be tasted.
What would it matter,
If we indulged in the latter
And forgot the previous existed?


Lottery Ticket Smirk.....written by LostNight

Thumbing through the book
For a number lost the other day
Can’t find it, maybe change
Didn’t want to call it anyway

Getting into the tube
Watching a pointless show
Letting time slip away
Probably loose a job, if I don’t go

Those far off dreams
When there’s no work
Spending lazy afternoons at play
I want to have the lottery ticket smirk

News cameras and mikes in my face
What are going to do with the wins?
It’s easy; buy the company where I work,
Fire the boss and give the business back again

I thought I would have more to say
Now must be on my way,
There are plans to be made
By the way, won’t be into work today

It sure would be nice, have to play
More than once or twice
My boss the jerk
Better watch out for the lottery ticket smirk..


silly love poem.....written by IfOnly..IfOnly..

You smell so sweet,
just like a rose.
I want to grab you,
and suck on your toes.


well hey thanks again everybody for stopping its July so come on back soon ya hear? :mrgreen: :grin:
inside each soul there is music...let the music play..

visit my poets page


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