Asked For It [Revised] [Questionable in nature.]

[BrightMindDarkHeart]

Pain, sharp, lungs squeezing, pain. He went faster as I fought, harder, crueler. How can he? How could he? Why? The question ran through my head as I wondered, cried, screamed. And broke. But deep down I know. I’d known all along. The pain was what I’d asked for. Wasn’t it? He’d said that was what I wanted. Wasn’t it?! Yes, yes! I need more, I pleaded, please more! Harder, faster, more more more! By then he couldn’t stop, and I couldn’t care. It was over. I was gone. He’s had his fun. And I was done.
For Now.

Raw. After. I couldn’t feel. So raw. It hurt to move, breath, even turn my head. What happened? My brain asked. But I held no comforting answer. Finally I made myself move. Hot, stinging pain shot up me, but I forced myself on. Sitting up I closed my eyes unwanting to see what happened. Unwanting to admit the trickling flow of harshness trailing over my body. Slowly I did, head spinning, and let out a moan. Blood covered my stomach, thighs, everything. It took me a time to acknowledge it wasn’t that bad. Most of the red was welts, from a rough, weather beaten hand. Realization hit.
As did unconsciousness.

He’d been back in my sleep. Stalking me in every since. Brutalizing me as well. Others were on their way. I knew it must be true. He had told me I’d asked for this, hadn’t he? Yes. I must have. The words replayed in my mind, over and over. He’d told me I had. I’d wanted this all along. That’s why I’d came. I’d asked for the pain. I’d provoked him on purpose. He’d only given me what I’d begged for. Oh dear God, had I begged?
I’d asked for it.

Light. He was home. They’d been back, and I’d been used, abused. But what was done was done. Something was different now though. I couldn’t feel him close. As I shifted enough to see myself, feel myself, on something. Something sticky. A bed for one. A red bed covered in.. Things of a velvet red. It’d grown cold by now. Cool and sticky to the touch. I shivered, goosebumps rising on my body. Blood, and other things were every where….
Everywhere.

Lights. Sound. Louder, brighter. I groaned out as my eyes opened. There were sirens close, people loud in the other room. I attempted to turn my head, the only thing that felt alive, and again saw the red. I screamed. Moments later the door was gone. Men, monsters, stood there, staring at me, open and afraid. I screamed again and then only saw darkness.
Nothingness.

Momentary hope. Could it be? The room was bright, that was new. I smiled a little and tried to sit up, but soon found my wrists bound. Then ankles. My breath came in sharper as each second ticked by. Only a thin white sheet covered me. The walls, the bed, the chains. All of it was white. Where was I? Was I even still alive? Heaven surely wouldn’t have chains though, I wondered to myself. Finally, something came into view, and a shudder of pain went through me. An IV was in, but what was connected to it didn’t look right, it looked brown…
I went back under.

Again I awoke. Throbbing. Head spinning. The room was still white.. Wrists and ankles still bound... Heart pounding.. I couldn't take much more, for sure. The IV was full again. They'd came back in my sleep. I’m not sure if that was more terrifying, or if the fact that I couldn’t feel pain where they would have touched was. Flashes of what had happened went though my head. Pain. Flash. Redness. Make it stop! Flash. I want to go home! Flash. This isn’t my home, this isn't a good place. The wall opened into a small square. He was standing there. Oh God.
He was back..

I awoke in a deep blue room. Flowers were in the window sill by the side of the bed.. It even smelled... Nice... Weakly smiling I sat up, the aches and pains having been erased for the most part. I touched my stomach slightly, tenderly, eyeing it curiously, as it was much, much smaller then I last remembered. I looked around and stood, smile faltering some as the door opened. To my surprise, an old looking man entered. Maybe it'd been a dream, I thought...
Food.

I ate slowly, trying to remember what people always said about not eating for a while then eating fast and throwing up.. I could feel my stomach clench around the new substance, savoring the taste. For a few blissful moments, the man had been completely eased out of my mind. Soon I found someone behind my persons though, gently rubbing my back. I didn't put up a fight, why should I, it felt so good.. Soon the hands hand moved to my front, gently massaging my rounded mounds.. It was so nice..
That's what she needed to think.

I continued eating, trying to brace myself. After about 1/3rd of the food was gone, I leaned back into the older man, setting the plate down and letting out an almost animalistic purr. I wasn’t aware of what was happening, but her aches were being soothed.. Flash.. Whiteness.. Gone.. I was falling, again.. Everything rushing by in a flash. Pain, red, sticky.. Not again.. Dreaming.. Yes it was a dream.. All of it was a dream! It had to be a dream.
Please let it be.

I came around once more. It seemed things had rewound and were playing again. Again. My body was moist from sweat and blood. There was a foul odor about the room, and brown smudged over my body in unmentionable places. I could even taste the foul specimen on my breath. Groaning softly, shifting on the bed, I surprisingly found my body free. I moved to stand instantly, but as should have been expected, my head started spinning within seconds. Dizzy. I sat back down and softly cried, streaks of hot tears joining the other things on my face..
I wanted home.

[BrightMindDarkHeart]

I’d waited until there were no more tears, no more pain. No feeling of any sort. It was time to leave. I hadn’t heard or felt anyone near since I’d had woken, and was hoping everyone was working. It was possible, wasn’t it? I’m not completely sure, and really don’t care. I’d managed to get onto my feet again, and this time was only a little bit queasy. I pushed on, with no other choice. Once I made it to the door, I grasped the handle, breathing hard, more sweat building. It’d taken a lot just for those few steps. My wrist turned on the handle..
And it turned.

I took in a sharp gasp when the handle had turned. A new energy filled my body.. There was a chance now. I had a chance, didn't I? Maybe. Just had to hurry. I pushed through the door and found myself in a warm and homely living room, more than likely the old mans. I didn't care anymore though. A phone. I started to it, but soon realized I didn't know where I was, and didn't know anyone to call. And I didn't have clothes. If given just one more chance, a few days later I could plan it all, and be free.
There was a chance.

I went back to the bed after about ten minutes of searching for clothes. That was all. I was careful not to move or mess anything up. Or leave traces of my being out of the room. I hurried, setting the clothes I found in a closet, carefully putting them under other clothes, making sure they looked perfect... A truck faraway trickled through the walls and doors, letting me know someone was home. Quickly, fast enough to cause me to ache, I got back to the bed, carefully wiping the handle of my.. Germs, that'd I 'd forgotten about. I sighed a little and closed my eyes.
Time for sleep.

I awoke again with food on the side of my bed. I was tired, and my bruises seemed thankfully to be healing. If anything, they weren't as painful. I eyed the room and took the food, starting to eat it. It was good. Tasted a little eccentric, but good. I winced a little as I bit on something hard. Pulling it out of my mouth I blinked and stared at it. It looked.. It looked like.. It couldn’t be, could it?
A finger.

I stared at it a moment, glancing to my own hands and wearily starting to count, praying I ended up with the right number… One, two…. Eight, nine, ten. I sighed, maybe this was a test. Yes, a test. I laughed, but couldn’t shake the feeling that.. That it tasted.. Like old, rotten meat. At least now it did. I hoped, no, I prayed, it was just in her mind.. Please let it just be in her mind..
My stomach churned.

Opening. Bright light. Morning? I tried to get up but found my ankles bound with chains. A tape, VCR, and T.V. was near on a bedside table, the tape already partway in. I leaned over and pushed the tape in, the T.V. automatically coming on. Oddly, I wasn’t worried, unable to make myself care. I heard after a few moments of static, a sound, then a picture moved into the screen. Next a deep, manly voice was ringing in my ears.
"Morning, small one."

My eyes widened. A man in all black was on the screen. His body took up the whole picture, it almost surprising at his size. I wonder if it was just his attempt to be more dramatic than he deserved, but something in the pit of my stomach told me it wasn’t. I shivered as I listened. The man started to talk, and my eyes closed, it hard to watch, and almost even hard to listen..
"Long time, no?"

The man went on, telling me how much he missed me, and how I’d be home again soon. Tears started to form as I placed the voice to the man from the first time, the one who had.. Who had.. I shuddered and softly started to cry, hearing herself on the T.V. now, grunts, whimpers.. Things no person should be made to listen to.
Screams.

I passed out somewhere in the middle. He had hours of the tape . Hours of my pleas, cries. My most intimate hurts.. I woke up a few minutes before the tape was over, when he was just talking again. Turns out he was returning to reclaim his so called “property,” as he called it. A few days.. I went pale at the thought of going back home with him. Things would just keep happening like they had already.
Tears welled up…

The man came back, feeding me once again, tending to my bruises and cuts.. It’d finally hit that he was why I was here. In addition to using my body, the older man was also there to make it better for another few weeks or so, then I would probably come back and be nurtured again, but not well enough that I could run away..
Possibly never that much.

That night I had the first taste of real tenderness when it came to love making that I had had in a long while. The older man was easily the gentlest person I had ever met, even before my bout with the one in black.. He stroked my body down when he was finish, whispering into my ear gently, his eyes reflecting sorrow and a bit of pity for the hurt girl..
Then he was gone.

Later that night, after I was cleaned, in clothes, or what was supposed to pass for real clothes but really was a few pieces of string called a bikini, due to the man in blacks orders, I was thrown on the back of a motorcycle and covered by a thin blanket, due to the older mans urging. A large man in leather was granted the unwanted pleasure of being my escort. It was obvious he could have easily cared more about a rat and drove an hour away back to his home..
Un-homely home.

The biker shoved me off easily once he arrived, and sped away. I had to crawl to the door he'd left me at. Finding a corner, still mostly bound, I clung to the blanket. I shivered and curled up tighter, praying no one would be out at that time of night, and closed my eyes to savor the last moments of solitude for a while.
Non-painful solitude.

Darkness again. I'd fallen asleep.. Trying to move I looked around and blinked. Warmth. Odd. New place.. I looked around and my eyes landed on someone sitting hunched over a desk. I made myself look around again, biting my lip softly. Only then did I realize I was on a couch.
"H-hello."

The man looked up and smiled. He seemed nice, I thought. Nibbling on my lower lip I hesitantly shifted again, trying not to, but my muscles were sore and ached to be stretched. I winced, as if thinking he was going to yell and hesitantly looked to him again. He smiled and nodded softly. "Go back to sleep."
I obeyed.

I woke up, groggily looking around. This time I was on a bed, a large one, I could tell. It smelled.. Manly. I winced and curled up, soon realizing I was curled up to a bear. My eyes widened some as I looked up, realizing the one who had been over the bed before, now was turning, throwing an arm over my small, frail body. I winced, expecting pain, but..
Nothing.

I squirmed a little and started to get up, needing to use the bathroom, but his arm tightened on my waist and I was afraid he might wake. After staying still for a minute, I started again, this time him staying lax. It took all of my weakened bodies strength to move his branch of an arm. Finally I did and scampered towards a door, only to find it went to the closet. Next I found one that lead to the hallway. I wondered later if the fact I had not considered running meant I‘d given up. Finally I found the bathroom and shut the door, a faint "click" sounding.
I had locked it.

I used the bathroom, and stared at the shower for a good few minutes. Should I risk him waking? I had to, I thought bitterly, my body smelling quite foul, to be frank. Tentatively I turned the water on and pulled a towel out, setting my clothes on the sink so they wouldn't get wet. I stepped into the shower and almost moaned.
It felt good.

Thirty minutes later, after I had shaven, having found a woman’s razor in the shower stall, I stepped out, smelling the best I had in it felt like months. I gulped, eyes widening as clean clothes were now on the sink and shuddered. I quickly dressed, almost as if thinking someone would jump out and take them away, not willing to wonder how long someone had been in the room without my knowledge. I also found a hairbrush, it looking nice in the mirror, straight with slight curls in it. I took a deep breath and set the hairbrush down and turned to the door.
I opened it.

Blinking, I stepped out, eyes not used to the brightness of the room. Momentary flash, I had thought someone had knocked me out, until the man came into focus. I saw him standing behind a just used camera. I blinked again and made a small smile despite what was flying through my head.
This was wrong.

A day passed. Things stayed the same.. I was allowed to do anything.. Everything.. Except of course, go outside, get on the internet, or use a phone. Maybe things were really starting to look up, it could be a lot worse... I frowned. Was this another safe house? It didn’t make sense. Nothing here made sense. I considered this for a moment, then shook my head, unwilling to think about what could happen again. It was okay.
Hopefully.

[BrightMindDarkHeart]

Next day. Odd, to be nice about it. Lots of baby formula showing up. I frowned a little, also finding oddly sized diapers in the kitchen, on the counter. I shook my head and paid it no real attention, starting to cook breakfast. A small sound of a door opening sounded in the background.
He was up.

It was almost frightening how fast he was in the room, scolding about the stove being too hot for me to play with. I and looked up at him as if he were mad. He did know I was practically, no, I was a grown woman? Or.. The idea struck her as unbelievable.
Was that the point?

I hadn't had enough time to fight it. He'd swatted my wrists, literally, and sat me in one of the stools at the kitchen counter, straps around my legs and wrists, keeping me securely tied to the chair.
Not again.

"Don't play on the stove baby.." I blinked at his words. What was he talking about? My jaw dropped. He hadn't hit me, he hadn't even yelled! Just continued on in that same condescending tone, as if I had disappointed my father rather then the complete stranger! Lord..
What is going on?

By the end of the day I had been baby-fied to the highest extent. Nothing was the same, or looked the same. Now there were pigtails instead of my straight hair. A frilly pink press. White socks and too-small ballerina-type shoes. I sighed, the only good thing in my head, was, well..
Things could be worse.

Wrong. God. Diapers.. I shuddered. I could smell the stench on her body, it almost like it wouldn't go away. I had to stay tied to a bed for the hours he was at work. Long, countless hours. Though he permitted me to watch TV, Barney was turning to my least favorite show. I sighed and comforted herself with the only things she could think of.. Something that was starting to not be quite as comforting as it had been once upon a time.
Could be worse.

He was home, again. God.. I sighed, pulling my knees to my chest in the tub, him standing over the sink, eyes on me, uncovered. I felt great, at least for the moment. The smell wasn't there, I was fed, even if it was with the most horrible goulash in the world. I even had a warm place to sleep. Trying to take his eyes off my exposed body, I splashed the water. I shuddered as he smiled at this. God.
Crazy.

He carried me to the bed, tucking me in after the bath. Oddly enough, he didn't strap my limbs down tonight. Instead.. I gulped. He crawled into the bed with me. I turned, putting my back to him, but him pulling me closer anyway. I took a deep breath, his hand finding my breast, and heard him murmur, "My, you're getting to be a big girl. We may have to go shopping soon sweetheart!" My heart sped up at that. He'd put me in a public place?? I turned and looked to him, fake happiness on my face.
"Really.. Daddy?"

I almost couldn't hide the flinch at calling him Daddy. He smiled though, pleased beyond words, and nodded. Soon he crawled out of the bed, after toying with my body some more, and shut the door, leaving me unbound. I stood and tried the knob, surprisingly finding it unlocked. I didn't leave though, letting out a loud sigh. I had to wait, just a little longer...
He was getting careless.

A few more days passed, and things kept getting slightly better. Yes, I had to call him Daddy a few more times, and yes, he was touching me more, but I didn't care. A door was opening, and I was only focused on it. About two weeks later, when my hopes had started to fall once more, he woke me up. Lifting me from the bed, he started to talk, but all I could think of was how he treated me.
Just like a child..

He coddled me and all the things he normally did, then presented me with a box and beamed. "Today we're going shopping baby. You need clothes so we can start going out to places." I blinked, not comprehending his words, but obediently started to open the box. I saw a pair of jeans, probably a little too small, and a shirt that looked made for a five year old, size wise, and a late twenty year old design wise. I looked up to him and smiled.
Today was the day.

It took me nearly 5 minutes to get ready, but he decided to take nearly two hours. By then I had curled up on his bed, knowing it would please him, and waited, squirming and bouncing on it at times, bored. It depressed me how I almost really was acting like a child. Finally he came out, and even I was surprised that he looked, well...
Fatherly.

I took his hand, and blinked as we walked outside. It was around 3 P.M. and hadn't seen the real sun in.. I blinked again. I laughed as I thought, unable to even remember how long it had been since I was free. He opened the door for me, and I shivered as he leaned in and strapped me in the seat, having a flashback of being thrown on a bike, tied down..
God, not now..

I almost went into a trance on the way to the mall, forcing the thoughts out of my head. When he pulled into the parking lot and parked, I started to unbuckle myself, then forced myself not to, letting him get out and do it. He was beyond pleased. Obediently I did what he wanted, and after spending nearly $200 and going through nearly five stores..
Then it was time.

I started to squirm as they went into one of the last stores, then started to tug on his sleeve, whimpering, whispering in a hushed tone. "Daddy! I have to go.. You know.." I murmured, looking up to him with, I hoped, big, innocent eyes. He looked at me and frowned, but then nodded and hesitantly pointed towards the restroom sign.
Yes!

I nodded and left, trying not to run, but careful to keep my legs closed so he wouldn't think I was lying. When I reached the bathroom I almost screamed. Gripping the counter, breathing hard, fighting to calm down. Breath. Looking in the mirror I blinked and shook my head, then looked around, praying for someone else to be in there.
Alone.

Oh God. Oh God please. I was starting to panic, then slapped myself, blinking back the fear. I went to the bathroom then, deciding to go ahead and go, it might be a while. When I flushed the toilet though, and started washing my hands, a woman about my age walked in.
She fought against the tears.

Hesitantly I turned and looked to the woman. "Miss?" I tentatively asked. "Miss, please. I.. Do you have a cell phone? Please, may I use it if you do? It's an emergency!" I was fighting to keep the hysteria out of my voice, and smiled at the woman when she, very reluctantly, handed the phone over.
I started to dial.

555-1423.. I dialed, fingers almost missing the numbers. I brought the phone to my ear and heard it ringing. After a moment I heard my mothers voice. "Hello?" The calm, emotionless voice said. "M-m-mom?" I whispered, and came no response. "Mom, it's me.. Please.. I need help." I gulped, almost expecting the phone to go dead, but then..
"Where are you?"

I slipped to the floor and thanked God I had looked to see what mall they were at, but cursed myself for not watching for road signs. Within the next 10 minutes, my mother had called the police, given them the name of the mall, and had someone searching each mall by the name They had found her, cowering in a corner after the man had came. He saw the phone in my hand and ran. I didn't try to stop him.
I just wanted home.

The police crowded around me, then within no more then thirty minutes I was in a hospital, my mother on her way as well. My eyes closed as I curled up on the hard bed, thanking God I was somewhere away from the bad men.. I shuddered suddenly, a dark figure in the doorway. He stared, and I stared back. He smiled, and with that everything around my collapsed as I passed out again.
He left.

Within the next hour, my family ending up to be just a mere 2 hours away, my mother, father, and every other family member I knew, and some I didn't, was at the hospital. My mother hadn't let go once she reached me, and I wasn't complaining. Within the next week I'd been shuffled home, with promises of staying in bed till my strength was back.
Bed, right.

Over the next few years I gradually learned to feel love again. I found a man, who accepted my past as a closed book, and who held me every night. Also, I received more then a few letters from two men. My husband never asked about that, either. One still called me baby, and told me he was happy for her. I’ve always wondered how many other girls he set free. The other? Well, he just sent a note, each year, same day. Can you guess what it said?
I will be back.

He never came back. The bad man, as I'd always called him, ended up dieing about ten years later, trying to get a new victim. The woman who brought him down? Well. She happened to be extremely little, and with her mother. The mother wasn't about to let her little girl get taken from her, like she'd been taken so many year ago.
Also, the mother recognized the man.

They said cause of death was his own weapon, a knife, being used on himself, right to the heart. Then, though no public, aside from two women and police-men, knew, there was also one other little factor.. His ball sac had been cut off, and found in a pickle jar next to where he laid dead in the park.
They figured he was just sick.

[heinzs]

Very raw...