Jessie
Posted: Tue Aug 23, 2005 8:38 am
I wonder if you know how hard it is
to look at your photo and feel naught;
To have my husband's hands touching my neck,
and to think of Shyla -
the name you helped me chose
for a little girl.
I'm different these days;
wrapped up in some cold quilt of denial.
Punished to live here in this world
of daggers and stones;
of bloody handkerchiefs called tie die,
and smeared eyeliner over the verdict.
You should have rotted there and died
like the way you killed my spirit.
Wrapping your icy hands around my throat
and plunging me forward with child -
onto my front.... onto my face... onto my belly.
twisting my neck to hear the crackle of my bones.
to scare my scream silent by your switchblade sword.
To steal my independence.
don't you just love yourself?
I could see death swirling in your eyes,
blinded by some kind of evil.
I didn't know you.
You are a sorry piece of worthless human flesh.
You've killed me and everything I ever was.
You changed me and reshaped me.
I am haunted by the life of you
and I am tainted by your memory.
to look at your photo and feel naught;
To have my husband's hands touching my neck,
and to think of Shyla -
the name you helped me chose
for a little girl.
I'm different these days;
wrapped up in some cold quilt of denial.
Punished to live here in this world
of daggers and stones;
of bloody handkerchiefs called tie die,
and smeared eyeliner over the verdict.
You should have rotted there and died
like the way you killed my spirit.
Wrapping your icy hands around my throat
and plunging me forward with child -
onto my front.... onto my face... onto my belly.
twisting my neck to hear the crackle of my bones.
to scare my scream silent by your switchblade sword.
To steal my independence.
don't you just love yourself?
I could see death swirling in your eyes,
blinded by some kind of evil.
I didn't know you.
You are a sorry piece of worthless human flesh.
You've killed me and everything I ever was.
You changed me and reshaped me.
I am haunted by the life of you
and I am tainted by your memory.
