Where Once Were Four
Moderators: thief of dreams, Moongem
- The Ravyn
- riding the cyclone
- Posts: 306
- Joined: Wed Dec 26, 2001 12:01 am
- Tag line: We miss you Jen
- Location: Denver, CO
- Contact:
Where Once Were Four
as a whirlwind you came
blowing before you
the tatters of our lives
like discarded candy wrappers
lifted and twirled about
then sent flying
across vacant lots
brown with the bleakness
of cold november
unwelcome guest
casting about you
the grief that defines
who you are
single-minded of purpose
to defile all that is good
in the murky tainted water
you have left behind
we now must bathe
soon now you will go
blown upon charnel gusts
that bespeak your legacy
taking with you
our hopes and dreams
you grasp the remnants
of our lives, grinning
where once were four
three only remain
blowing before you
the tatters of our lives
like discarded candy wrappers
lifted and twirled about
then sent flying
across vacant lots
brown with the bleakness
of cold november
unwelcome guest
casting about you
the grief that defines
who you are
single-minded of purpose
to defile all that is good
in the murky tainted water
you have left behind
we now must bathe
soon now you will go
blown upon charnel gusts
that bespeak your legacy
taking with you
our hopes and dreams
you grasp the remnants
of our lives, grinning
where once were four
three only remain
take my hand if you don't know where you're goin' ... i'll understand .... i've lost the way myself ...
j. kaye
whatever you do ... don't click here
j. kaye
whatever you do ... don't click here
- JukotoxKanashimi
- batteries not included
- Posts: 298
- Joined: Sat Dec 20, 2003 8:27 pm
- Location: California
- Contact:
- The Ravyn
- riding the cyclone
- Posts: 306
- Joined: Wed Dec 26, 2001 12:01 am
- Tag line: We miss you Jen
- Location: Denver, CO
- Contact:
thanks! ummm actually it's about dealing with a life threatening illness ... and the probable aftermath
take my hand if you don't know where you're goin' ... i'll understand .... i've lost the way myself ...
j. kaye
whatever you do ... don't click here
j. kaye
whatever you do ... don't click here
- JukotoxKanashimi
- batteries not included
- Posts: 298
- Joined: Sat Dec 20, 2003 8:27 pm
- Location: California
- Contact:
- The Ravyn
- riding the cyclone
- Posts: 306
- Joined: Wed Dec 26, 2001 12:01 am
- Tag line: We miss you Jen
- Location: Denver, CO
- Contact:
lol ... you aren't stupid ... can't say on the 'insane' thingie ... ;o) and it wasn't all that clear to begin with ... even cg didn't quite get it!
take my hand if you don't know where you're goin' ... i'll understand .... i've lost the way myself ...
j. kaye
whatever you do ... don't click here
j. kaye
whatever you do ... don't click here
- moonflower
- enchanted by the magic
- Posts: 2190
- Joined: Sun Mar 24, 2002 12:01 am
- Location: longview tx
- Reig.the.Lost
- Lost in plain sight
- Posts: 105
- Joined: Fri Oct 31, 2003 11:19 am
- Location: Middle O' Nowhere
- Contact:
Ravyn, this very much is right on the mark. To define the impact of illness in a poetic manner is difficult, but this piece is well written.unwelcome guest
casting about you
the grief that defines
who you are
>><<:::>><<:::>><<:::>><<:::>><<:::>><<:::>><<:::>><<:::>><<:::>><<
...Yet the stones remain less real to those who cannot
name them, or read the mute syllables graven in silica.
To see a red stone is less than seeing it as jasper—
metamorphic quartz, cousin to the flint the Kiowa
carved as arrowheads.
To name is to know and remember
_____________'Words', Dana Gioia
~*~
...Yet the stones remain less real to those who cannot
name them, or read the mute syllables graven in silica.
To see a red stone is less than seeing it as jasper—
metamorphic quartz, cousin to the flint the Kiowa
carved as arrowheads.
To name is to know and remember
_____________'Words', Dana Gioia
~*~
Ya know I read through this twice just to enjoy the words employed. It conjures all kinds of interesting images other than the one you intended
In my book,.....what fine poetry ought to do.
In my book,.....what fine poetry ought to do.
I prefer to keep an open mind,....but not so much that my brains fall out.- Carl Sagan
Your brain is like an umbrella. It only works when it's open- Someone Smart
Poet of the Month
March 2011
Your brain is like an umbrella. It only works when it's open- Someone Smart
Poet of the Month
March 2011
- The Ravyn
- riding the cyclone
- Posts: 306
- Joined: Wed Dec 26, 2001 12:01 am
- Tag line: We miss you Jen
- Location: Denver, CO
- Contact:
i've been a bit lax in expressing my thanks to you all ... my bad ... i'll try to do better but ... i can't really promise anything
take my hand if you don't know where you're goin' ... i'll understand .... i've lost the way myself ...
j. kaye
whatever you do ... don't click here
j. kaye
whatever you do ... don't click here
- thief of dreams
- surrounded by shadows
- Posts: 1706
- Joined: Tue Jan 08, 2002 12:01 am
- Location: Bakersfield, California USA
- Contact:
- thief of dreams
- surrounded by shadows
- Posts: 1706
- Joined: Tue Jan 08, 2002 12:01 am
- Location: Bakersfield, California USA
- Contact:
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