The Anger That Kills

[John DeBona]

The anger that kills,
And destroys our wills,
Tears at our hearts,
And keeps us apart.
Moments are wasted,
like vomit re-tasted.
Cant get them back
They're holes in the sack.
Seeds scattered and thrown,
The weeds overgrown.
Its the anger that kills,
So swallow the pills.
It cuts like a knife,
It's the end of a life.

[heinzs]

In a way a personification of Anger while still being more philosophical than expository. After reading it I feel like something is missing, but can't put my finger on anything specific. Perhaps a third reading later will bring more clarity.

Thank you for posting, John.

[crocbait]

I think whats missing is the twist. What lies beneath the anger...what the anger conceals...pain
I think somehow if you could twist the end to show its the unbearable pain that causes the anger which is directed inward and results in the suicide.
I think.
Or maybe not.
I like it. But I agree it doesn't quite feel complete.

[SamIAm]

I have a rule I always try to follow (though I fail on multiple occassions): Poetry is saying the same thing everyone else has always said - but in a way no one has ever said it before. I try hard not to fall into the "cliche" trap unless it's deliberate for humorous reasons. Sometimes, the Alcoholic's famous phrase fits this concept: "First thought wrong."

With this said "vomit re-tasted" is a tremendously awesome line. "Cuts like a knife" has been used in too many songs from the 80's. Half the fun of poetry is coming up with unique ways of saying "cuts like a knife." It'll just generally take more than one line. That's just my humble opinion. This from a guy whose dad use to work for Hallmark.