Aschmutt

[Aschmutt]

<a name="#sixteen"> One sad night </a>

You drove away one night
Fast in you new green truck
Illuminated by the moon-lit night
To pick up your first date, what luck!
You picked her up at quarter to 10
And complimented her on how she looked
How was I to know I’d never see you again,
That you’d just be another name in that dreaded book
Cruising down the street on you way to Fred’s
You failed to hesitate at the green light
The screams from your date will never leave your head
As she turned a pale shade of white
The car was a mess
You didn’t have a chance
Bloodstains on her white satin dress
Now you’ll never go to the dance
The other driver walked away
With barely a scratch on his face
Why should you be the one to pay?
For this guy’s insult to the human race
I love you and goodbye for now
I’m sure we’ll meet again someday,
Do not think that this is the end,
For true love forever will stay

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[Aschmutt]

<a name="#seventeen">detached heart</a>

The lonely teardrops fall from her face,
One by one,
Sliding down her cheeks, red from despair.
One lands on his hand,
He brushes it away,
Without a care in the world.
He looks into her heartbroken eyes,
His stare cold and heartless,
As if his love for her had meant nothing
Her eyes long for him to
Sweep her off her feet again,
Yet he just turns and walks away,
His brisk step finalizing their departure.
They walk their separate ways,
Him toward the future,
Her to the past,
She looks back,
He looks ahead,
Taking her heart with him
And tossing it aside.

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[Aschmutt]

<a name="#eighteen"> My Guardian Angel </a>

You are the angel God sent me from heaven
With wings to carry me when I have fallen
And hands to guide me back to my feet
Arms to hold me when I am sad
And a shoulder to cry on when things go wrong
Feet to walk beside me through the good times and the bad
And eyes to tell me that everything will be all right
A heart as pure as gold
One to understand the hardships in life
To empathize with my every problem
And guide me through the toughest of times
A smile that shines brightly
Like a light to reveal the secrets hidden in my heart
To listen when I am in need
And tell me things couldn’t get any worse
Your eyes could tell a whole story
With sincerity that burns into my heart
Telling me I can always confide in you
And challenging me to face my fears
The values you live out each and every day
Such as honesty, patience and love
Have helped me to re-evaluate my life
And have given me comfort in knowing you are my friend
You have saved me from desperation
With a smile and an open heart
Given me hope when I found none
And have guided me to happiness once again
The never ending flow of love
You send to every acquaintance and friend
Has taught me to forgive
And stick through it to the bitter end
You are always there for me
Standing by my side
Holding my hand as we walk through life
You are my guardian angel

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[Aschmutt]

<a name="#nineteen">When I get to be a pilot</a>

When I get to be a pilot
I’m gonna fly myself around the world
Visiting Africa, touching the hot sands on the Kalahari Desert
Engulfing myself in the culture
Sleeping outdoors next to the elephants
Under the moon-lit, star-studded
And then I’d fly to Australia
To dive and explore the unknown world of the ocean
And hop along with the kangaroos and wallabies
And after that I’d fly to Germany
To see the sun come over the horizon
Watching the stars come out at night
While visiting with my cousins at a café
And catching up on old times
And last I’d visit the Amazon
To study wildlife
Live among the bugs and monkeys
Watch the animals in their natural habitats
And live to be a part of it
I’m going to live to fulfill my dreams
By flying around the world
When I get be a pilot

my love for traveling prevails....how great it would be to travel the world!!

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[Aschmutt]

<a name="#twenty"> Help! </a>

I look at the cuts on her arms
marks that scream for help
deep with pain and hurt no one could possibly understand
red with anger that no one cares
her desperate plea calls out to me
her eyes enraged like a fire fed by the betrayal of her loved ones
filled with tears of hurt and embarrassment
a blank stare with no where to turn
no where to run
her heart broken into a million worthless pieces
never to be mended again
stepped all over by her so-called “friends”
used and abused like a good-for-nothing rag doll
drowned by loneliness
dead, never to be happy again
she has hit rock bottom
the dark 6 foot walls closing in on her
yet no one is there
she is left abandoned
by love, happiness and compassion
and engulfed by fear, pain and suffering
Staring at the agonized figure in the mirror
I pray to God that He will save me

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[Aschmutt]

<a name="#twenty one"> giving up </a>

i do not want
i do not need
from an open hand
its your hate i feed
i am not loved
nor am i cared for
its your guilt that
sends me crawling on the floor
i feel the hurt
i breathe the pain
its your anger
that pours over me like rain
i am weak
i can no longer stay afloat
its my heartache
that concludes my suicide note

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[Aschmutt]

<a name="#twenty two">Dare to Dance the Tide</a>

The sparkling green of the calm morning waters
still and tranquil, free of worry
quiet before the wrath of the wind
bringing about the never-ending cycle of waves
Challenges to those who choose to face them
Obstacles to those with fear in their hearts
Do we choose to fight
or do we choose to fall?
Do we cower before the Gods of the Sea
or dare to dance the tide?
Do we ride the next perfect wave
or just let it pass us by?
The sea is life
full of obstacles
Do we ride life as the wave of hopes and dreams,
the wave of challenge, testing our strength?
Do we simply watch life
a cycle of waves passing us by?
Or do we accept the challenge
and dare to dance the tide.
_________________________

let's see if this sounds better...


sparkling green of calm morning waters
still and tranquil, free of worry
quiet before
a wrath of wind
bringing about a never-ending cycle of waves
Challenges to those who choose to face them
Obstacles to those with fear in their hearts
Do we choose to fight
or do we choose to fall?
Do we cower before
Gods of the Sea
or dare to dance the tide?
Do we ride this next perfect wave
or just let it pass us by?
sea is life
full of obstacles
Do we ride life as a wave of hopes and dreams,
a wave of challenge, testing our strength?
Do we simply watch life
a cycle of waves passing us by?
Or do we accept our challenges
and dare to dance the tide.

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[Aschmutt]

<a name="#twenty three"> the beach awakens </a>

waves crash,
sun blazes,
seagulls scavenge,
barbeques sizzle,
kids giggle,
girls sunbathe,
guys play,
moms watch,
dads chill,
surfers ride,
frisbee flies,
sunscreen melts,
saltwater smells,
sunglasses glare,
food cooks,
sandcastles grow,
water soothes,
radios blast,
sun rises,
the beach awakens.

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[Aschmutt]

<a name="#twenty four"> incessant thoughts </a>

I can't stop thinking
about the knife sitting in my drawer
cold and lonely
untouched
unloved
I sit here tonight
thinking
wondering
maybe it needs a visit
its cool gentle blade needs
that touch of flesh
that promise of comfort
to ease its loneliness
my skin needs to feel
its searing edge
that comforting feeling
that wonderful euphoria
to lessen the pain
the hurt
the heartache
and to console the heart
that is aching so tonight

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[Aschmutt]

<a name="#twenty five">journey's end</a>

Dark clouds cast over me
covering me with a blanket of loneliness
the night's cool breeze
breathes down my neck
as if threatening me to give in
alone I stand
with my thoughts feeding ravenously on my mind
boring right down to the skull
leaving it exposed
for the world to see
I am at Your mercy
take of me what You will
my heart, my soul, ripped away
from a lifelong grip
I have no more to give
emptiness fills the body
as tears fill my eyes
the journey ceases in existence
the downfall has overcome

*i wasn't really sure which category this belonged in....guess here is my best bet

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[Aschmutt]

<a name="#twenty six"> My body is my sketch pad </a>

my body is my sketch pad
let me carve of it what I will
deep red seeping lines
here and there
tiny tick marks
covering my hands
an “X” marks the spot
on my oh-so-favorite part
hidden beneath the band of my watch
kept for my hate-filled eyes to see
where to next, I ask myself
for all my favorite spots are filled
while others are just too obvious
for wandering eyes to find
luckily the winter has yet to subside
as I pull up my pant leg
fresh skin, soon to be tainted
by the longing for hurt
the need for pain
one slash, not even 2 will suffice
5 angered, yet careful cuts later
blood runs down my leg
coloring my socks a bright new shade of red
peroxide and bandages scatter my floor
as I return to routine
patching myself up
good as new
my body is my sketch pad
let me carve of it what I will
self-loathing and pure hatred
my mind forever ill

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[Aschmutt]

<a name="#twenty seven"> To Live </a>

you stand before me
your tall, slim stature
stunning with confidence
and self-assurance
hope radiating from within
reaching out to touch my heart
long, dark hair
flows down your back
accentuating your
dark eyes
intriguing, empathetic
warm, insightful
burning through my mind
searching, reaching into my soul
pulling for trust
pleading for faith
smiling
your calming presence
eases my mind
your caring voice
soothes my heart
your faith in me
keeps me alive
your encouragement
keeps me going
the honesty and compassion
residing in your heart
have given me the will to live

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[Aschmutt]

<a name="#twenty eight">Imperfect</a>

12 small imperfections
arranged carefully
constructed haphazardly
glowing in my mind
yet invisible to the untrained eye
12 small imperfections
bred from guilt
spreading hopelessness
sustained in impulsivity
12 small imperfections
permanently fixed
etched in my skin
embedded in my heart
12 small imperfections
12 constant reminders
12 painful sins
12 imperfect parts
of me

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[Aschmutt]

<a name="#twenty nine">suffocation</a>

Look at the pain and fear
in her eyes
trickling down like a single tear
waiting to be saved
See the anguish
with each move she makes
a struggle
waiting to be conquered
Feel her guilt
her heartache
her loneliness
overflowing in her veins
consuming her blood
slowly depriving her
of that which she wants the least

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[Aschmutt]

<a name="#thirty"> tonight, this night</a>

tonight, this night
time will forever stand still
like the lone weary soldier,
i fight against my will
the will to live,
gone,
swept away like
a cool autumn breeze
the will to die
strong
breeding like fire
that feasts on unclaimed air
these smal beads of death
glistening by the moonlight
preparing to satisfy my
wretched heart,
my empty soul
tonight, this night
time will forever stand still
the battle is deceased
and i eternally ill

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