*Wasn't too sure where to stick this one, but after reading it over and over I thought it could be inspirational so its here.*
Usually when a loved one dies,
all the secrets and lies come out.
That statment relates to this case.
I have been loved all my life,
by parents and grandparents,
aunts and uncles, but in different
degrees of love.
There is much I know now,
that I was guarded from my entire life,
and I now understand why she
wanted it that way.
The things I have learned, after she died,
would kill anyone's soul.
Things she did to her kids, herself,
things done to her,
things done to me.
But because of this...this "keeping secrets"
I now have a brighter perspective
on who I am, why I am the way I am,
my family and why they are the way
they are.
None of the given information is easy to digest,
years of abuse,
physical
emotional
sexual,
Lives and loves lost.
Lives and loves gained.
I thought I got out lucky,
I thought I was spared.
Everyone but me had major problems,
and now I have a plethora of new
info to try and stomach.
Information pertaining to me.
Things I did not know.
Things I did not want to know.
And I'll handle that myself,
no burdens for anyone else,
but I realize why she wanted to
wait to tell me until after she was gone.
She couldn't have delt with it.
She couldn't have delt with my pain.
Which suprisingly, is not really pain
at all, but understanding, reasoning,
and hope.
A hope that my life and my child's life
will be completly different, and a reason to
live for the future, not fear it.
Death was always my biggest fear,
until I watched her die.
So peaceful.
So serene.
Drifting off into perpetual slumber.
Even the long beep of the heart monitor
sounded peaceful.
I'm not mad that she never told me
before now.
I know what her true intentions were.
To protect me, which is what she spent her
life doing, and continues to do
from the afterlife.
Her True Intentions(no revisions yet)
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Forum for spiritual, inspirational and religiously oriented poetry and discussion.
Autoprune 12 months
Forum for spiritual, inspirational and religiously oriented poetry and discussion.
Autoprune 12 months
- Phoenix J. Star
- Rock Star Jenni
- Posts: 473
- Joined: Thu Jul 25, 2002 12:01 am
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Her True Intentions(no revisions yet)
"The only difference between the saint and the sinner is that every saint has a past, and every sinner has a future."
Oscar Wilde
Oscar Wilde
Re: Her True Intentions(no revisions yet)
-----------------------------
My Jesus hung out with thieves and sluts and liars, which Jesus do you worship?
---Todd Agnew
Perfection is my enemy
Procrastination is his cohort
Persistence is my sword
---Gordy
My Jesus hung out with thieves and sluts and liars, which Jesus do you worship?
---Todd Agnew
Perfection is my enemy
Procrastination is his cohort
Persistence is my sword
---Gordy
-
- Forever Silent Friend
- Posts: 766
- Joined: Sat Aug 09, 2008 2:08 pm
- Location: Near Durham City UK
- Contact:
Re: Her True Intentions(no revisions yet)
Secrecy is sometimes necessary but the truth eventually becomes known/Leaving you with unanswerable questions
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