Why Is The Sky Blushing?
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Forum for your general poetry that may or may not also fit into other forums as well. If you wouldn't want your 12-year old daughter to read it, don't post it here.
Autoprune 12 months.
Forum for your general poetry that may or may not also fit into other forums as well. If you wouldn't want your 12-year old daughter to read it, don't post it here.
Autoprune 12 months.
- DarleneG
- 65 Roses
- Posts: 769
- Joined: Mon Jun 18, 2012 5:29 am
- Tag line: Encourage One Another
- Location: San Diego, CA
Why Is The Sky Blushing?
The blushing sky
under evenings spell,
Saw sun kissing sea
and did not tell.
.
under evenings spell,
Saw sun kissing sea
and did not tell.
.
"Poetry is what in a poem makes your toenails twinkle."----Dylan Thomas
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**Member of the Month**
July 2012
Re: Why Is The Sky Blushing?
Very nice Darlene! Way to go girl! Sometimes, the least said the better. Look at the Japanese Haiku. I rarely do myself,...but that's beside the point. I think what the form is attempting to capture is the momentous immediacy in which beauty itself is presented to us, and yet so many become unaware of it's presence. Anyway liked this one a bunch. Good work.
I prefer to keep an open mind,....but not so much that my brains fall out.- Carl Sagan
Your brain is like an umbrella. It only works when it's open- Someone Smart
Poet of the Month
March 2011
Your brain is like an umbrella. It only works when it's open- Someone Smart
Poet of the Month
March 2011
- DarleneG
- 65 Roses
- Posts: 769
- Joined: Mon Jun 18, 2012 5:29 am
- Tag line: Encourage One Another
- Location: San Diego, CA
Re: Why Is The Sky Blushing?
Thanks, bags! Now I am the one blushing from your comments. Does this qualify as a Haiku, or do I need to change the form? This poem was born when I watched the sunset by the sea last week.
"Poetry is what in a poem makes your toenails twinkle."----Dylan Thomas
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**Member of the Month**
July 2012
Re: Why Is The Sky Blushing?
A Haiku is generally a form whose first verse is 5 sylables long, 2nd verse is 7 long, and last verse is again 5 long. Heinz might be able to define it better for you,...so,...and example would be :
Cherry blossoms float
Gently in the Springtime breeze
Landing in dog @$#t.
I'm sure there are much better examples to be found,...but that's the general idea. I've never been a big fan personally,...but there are millions of Japanese who disagree.
Cherry blossoms float
Gently in the Springtime breeze
Landing in dog @$#t.
I'm sure there are much better examples to be found,...but that's the general idea. I've never been a big fan personally,...but there are millions of Japanese who disagree.
I prefer to keep an open mind,....but not so much that my brains fall out.- Carl Sagan
Your brain is like an umbrella. It only works when it's open- Someone Smart
Poet of the Month
March 2011
Your brain is like an umbrella. It only works when it's open- Someone Smart
Poet of the Month
March 2011
- DarleneG
- 65 Roses
- Posts: 769
- Joined: Mon Jun 18, 2012 5:29 am
- Tag line: Encourage One Another
- Location: San Diego, CA
Re: Why Is The Sky Blushing?
Oh, no! Beautiful cherry blossoms do not deserve to land there! Yes, bags, I know about the 5-7-5 Haiku form. But I think there are other more modern Haiku forms that might fit my poem better. And yes, Heinz, (our poetry master)would know. Thanks!
"Poetry is what in a poem makes your toenails twinkle."----Dylan Thomas
*****************************************************************
**Member of the Month**
July 2012
Re: Why Is The Sky Blushing?
Darlene - simply beautiful, beautifully simple.
I'm not much for counting syllables, (Bags - I think you mean 1st line, 2nd line etc.). Haiku is "offically" meant to be three lines, and contain some reference to the seasons, and/or images from nature. It's a lovely little poem, which doesn't need a label.
Gillian
I'm not much for counting syllables, (Bags - I think you mean 1st line, 2nd line etc.). Haiku is "offically" meant to be three lines, and contain some reference to the seasons, and/or images from nature. It's a lovely little poem, which doesn't need a label.
Gillian
Re: Why Is The Sky Blushing?
Lines,....yes. Thank you Chancellor.
I prefer to keep an open mind,....but not so much that my brains fall out.- Carl Sagan
Your brain is like an umbrella. It only works when it's open- Someone Smart
Poet of the Month
March 2011
Your brain is like an umbrella. It only works when it's open- Someone Smart
Poet of the Month
March 2011
- DarleneG
- 65 Roses
- Posts: 769
- Joined: Mon Jun 18, 2012 5:29 am
- Tag line: Encourage One Another
- Location: San Diego, CA
Re: Why Is The Sky Blushing?
Thank you, Gillian. for your helpful comments about this poem not needing a label. I guess we tend to do this to too many things! It's so gratifying that you and the others who have commented like this poem. What better subjects to write about then the many things that glorify the earth and remind us of our God. Blessings, Darlene
"Poetry is what in a poem makes your toenails twinkle."----Dylan Thomas
*****************************************************************
**Member of the Month**
July 2012
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